I just stepped out on our balcony. It's midnight and chilly but not too cold. The bits of sky that peak out from behind the clouds are a deep, dark, blue. It smells just like Grandma and Grandpa Hunter's house. I'm ready for a walk down the lane to look at stars...

I've been missing home a lot the past few days. I think it's partly because everything (moving, teaching, traveling, etc.) is finally settling down. I've also been feeling like I keep finding things to mess up or I just don't seem to be getting it completely right. Whether it's at the grocery store, communicating with the people around me (and no I don't mean with the language barrier- just communicating in general) or most recently - dealing with the bank and my money, I feel like I'm constantly in need of grace, needing God to come through for me.

And on the one hand, I know that's the reality of where we all are, and where God loves us to be. But on the other hand I think, ok, how many times am I going to get myself into trouble?? Can't I get something right for once? Do I really deserve grace when it's completely my stupidity or fault that got me there in the first place? Honestly, these are not thoughts and feelings I'm used to having. I guess that's part of the "living on my own...in a foreign country" thing, but it's still kind of surprising and not very fun. Maybe a little humbling is what I needed...

But yes, I know God is faithful. And I know that of course I don't deserve grace, but that's the beauty of it and God does freely give it. Over and over and over... and over again. It's a beautiful but hard lesson to learn, and I'm only beginning to grasp it.

Anyways, just of a few of my recent thoughts... how's that for two entries in one week?? :)